Tim’s Kitchen Creations: Beer Mac

One of the staples of college nutrition, Easy Mac is cheap, decent, and easy to make. Which is truth in advertising that is to be commended. When I was a freshman at Wisconsin, I came back from one of the many drunken nights and decided that I didn’t want to walk all the way down the dorm hallway to get water for my Easy Mac. Instead, I figured beer would work just fine. So I poured a little bit of my Keystone Light into the Easy Mac and threw it in the microwave. I was pleasantly surprised at the result. So now, as an adult, I’ve decided to recreate that supposed abomination to see just how good it really was.

The Recipe

Ingredients

1 package Easy Mac
1 beer of choice (Don’t get fancy here. Nobody wants grapefruit IPA flavored mac ‘n’ cheese.)

Directions

Step 1 : Run out of groceries.
Step 2: Swear word of choice. Walk or drive to nearest convenience store.

Please walk if this is the picture you would take.

Step 3: Read the directions on the Easy Mac box. Instead of following them, open the package of noodles, and dump into microwave safe bowl. Measure out 2/3 cup of beer of choice, and pour on top of the noodles. Alternatively, measuring is bullshit. Pour some beer onto the noodles until it feels right. 

Step 4: Cook in microwave for 3.5 – 4 minutes.
Step 5: Pour cheese packet on top of the noodles. Ponder how powdered cheese works, accept that the world is full of unexplained wonders, and mix thoroughly.

Step 6: Find a fork, spoon, spork, or leftover utensils from the last time you ordered delivery, and enjoy.

The Result

Really good. It tastes really good. Beer Mac is fantastic. It’s honestly way better than normal Easy Mac. I had Easy Mac the way you’re supposed to make it the next night, and it tasted like a watered down version of normal Kraft Mac. But Beer Mac tastes like a premium, nay, artisanal version of Kraft Mac. It has flavor notes besides “almost as good as the cheese sauce smelled” and “exists”. What those flavor notes are, I have no idea. I just know that Easy Mac + beer = tastes really good, while Easy Mac + normal instructions = meh. Plus it has the added nutritional benefit of light beer, which is a low-calorie option that helps you lose weight.

The downside is if you don’t drink the leftover beer, you’re wasting about 2/3 of the can. You could, however, put it back in the refrigerator. Or leave it out on the counter until you drink next. Or make 2 more servings. All of which I endorse. Unfortunately, if you’re currently in college, you might not be 21 yet, so I have absolutely no idea how you could possibly ever get beer, since it’s illegal at that age. 

Beer Mac: 4 Stars

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